Droplets of Vastness ~ why crying is healthy

“There must be something strangely sacred in salt. It is in our tears and in the sea.” ~ Khalil Gibran

I'd been meaning to write about tears and the act of crying as a genuine practice of self-expression and self-healing for a few months, when finally the first words and basic structure of this text emerged and I dedicated time to it.

Today, besides experiencing profound freedom, my body is filled with a peaceful softness inside that is extremely grounding to me, whenever I surrender wholeheartedly to my tears. How beautifully paradoxical it is to be filled with spaciousness, with an emptiness that is capable of embracing All, even if for brief moments.

Yet, it wasn't always like that. Many times in my life letting my teardrops flow wherever I was led me to some embarrassment, and I might get to this at a later point in time to share some of my stories. Even though I knew the tears I cried weren't always tears of suffering ~ they were also tears of joy ~ it took me a while to let people know I was having a good time and that I was in fact, in the midst of an experience of transcendent connection to the Sacred, within and without.

Most people associate crying with weakness, and being vulnerable is still to be valued and seen as authenticity and an act of courage in itself. There are nuances here, that I am also willing to dive into in a future blog post. For this one, I am keeping the eyes on crying as a way of healing and facing emotions courageously and compassionately towards yourself.

How free are you to cry? Are you able to embrace your emotions with self-compassion? What is your relationship with your tears?

Some mystical practices consider tears as gifts. Saint Ignatius of Loyola wrote many times in his Spiritual Diary about his tears. “I felt what seemed an intense warmth in every part of my body, followed by tears and the most intense devotion.” He considered them as movements of the soul, motions that would lead to a closer contact to God, to the feeling of this immense and intense love that is transforming ~ a love that is capable of changing who you are and that you begin feeling towards everyone and everything.

From a different perspective, if you bring about what happens when a baby is hungry or when a toddler hurts the knees, tears show that something in someone needs to be taken care of, something in someone is in need of attention. So, as an adult, what might be inside you, in need of your love and consideration? Even if you can not name it, can you sense it in your body? Where? What would it take you to get in more intimate touch with it? It may not be comfortable ~ sometimes it is really not ~ but the impact of crying is relief and serenity, no matter where someone is in their spectrum of experiences.

Some people, though, are not able to let themselves be with strong emotions so that they are released, transformed, so that they teach you something. And it is healthy to ask for help. It takes time for people to realize that the more they refuse to face their emotions, the more stuffed inside they become, in a particularly unhealthy way. Research shows that crying releases different kinds of substances associated to the different kinds of tears that, as humans, we produce. There are tears of reflex, continuous tears and tears of emotion. While the first two lubricate our eyes ~ whether to clear from particles of dust, smoke or exhaust in the first case or to protect us from infection and bacteria in the second ~ emotional tears biologically are the ones responsible for the release of well-being hormones, like oxytocin and endorphins.

Emotional tears are the ones I am referring to here and I invite you to connect to your own experience and hold it in the background as you continue reading me.

Photo by Mickey O'neil on Unsplash

Surrendering to my tears has nourished me in a variety of moments, temporally and spatially. Crying led me to insights I don't know I would have reached otherwise with such clarity of mind, heart and body. And if I were to try and describe my experience of a particular point in time ~ when I needed to cry more frequently ~ it felt like everything was being washed by my tears and they were in fact cleaning and lubricating my whole self, not only my eyes so I could see, and I became able to hold a more expanded awareness of myself and the world around me. I could see with my whole body aspects I was blind to before.

And the beauty I saw ~ both in the process and in myself ~ emerged fully from within and around myself, and I embraced the parts of me that needed healing with an almost indescribable quality of love and compassion for myself. I was immersed in joy and gratitude for the present moment and for what I had experienced in the past. Crying has also become a spiritual experience, and I have enough freedom to intentionally allow myself into it, whenever the need arises. I do consider I am granted these moments and I have learned to receive them as gifts, as blessings.

Deepen your way of being

Crying is not the only way to honor emotions and learn with them. Bear in mind that something that is profoundly meaningful for someone, may not be for you and it is okay. Giving it a try, though, is healthy. It may change the way you see yourself, it may enhance your self-awareness. Curiosity towards growth and transformation works in small steps and eventually the meaning you make of your tears, yourself and your stories may change.

Sitting with your own emotions ~ however challenging they are ~ and being compassionate towards yourself leads you to an expanded sense of Self-love and a greater capacity to be there for others when they need it. Emotions always teach us something and this is what I suggest you pay attention to, this is the realm where I invite you to enter. Go beneath the surface of what you feel and spend time to dive gently in your emotions, looking beyond and being curious for the beauty that exists is in the profound waters of your being.

If it leads to tears, face them. Look at them as portals that may take you from a stormy weather, to a sea of tranquility, inside and outside.

Inspiration for Growth and Self Awareness

Here you will find different resources to help you connect with your inner wisdom and navigate your emotions. Take a moment and spend some quality time breathing in what most appeals to you. People are different and are drawn to to their inner self in a variety of ways, and my invitation to you is imple: pause, breathe, and enjoy some of what I have curated for you. All of them speak dearly to my heart, soul,and spirit. After each of them, you will find questions for self-reflection.

Gazing at the Sky

When was the last time you stopped to see how different the sky looks every day? Sometimes clear blue, sometimes with beautiful white clouds that nourished your child mind when you were little, sometimes heavy and grey clouds signal storms and strong winds. All of these different moods of the Sky can change rapidly in the course of hours or be steady for months, depending on where you are in the Globe. The Sky lives wholeheartedly and goes with the flow. Sometimes it pours down, and moments later, the calmness is restored.

Take a few moments each day to gaze at the Sky. Sunrises and Sunsets are my favorite hours for the different colors that arise and the beauty of the ever changing light, yet, you may practice this any time that suits you. Pay attention to what you see and experience, both inside and outside, and reflect on these questions:

What have I learned from gazing at the Sky today? What did I see? Did the movements in the Sky impact me? What will I take forward from this practice into my days ahead?

A Poem by Rumi | The Guest House

This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.

What have I experienced reading this poem? Did the words of Rumi impact me? If so, in what ways? What emotion was my guide today? What will I take forward from contemplating this poem into my days ahead?

A Song by Ayla Schafer | Grandmother (I am the Earth)

Grandmother speak to me, I am the Earth and the Earth is singing The water flows around this rock, the ancient ways I carry forth The river carries me

I am the Earth and the Earth is singing through me I am the Earth and the Earth is breathing through me I am the Earth and the Earth is feeling through me I am the Earth and the Earth is healing through me

I welcome it all, I welcome all these feelings I welcome it all, I welcome all these teachings I welcome it all, I welcome this healing I welcome it all, I welcome all that life brings

All that life brings, all that life brings, A wey ya wey ya ho All these teachings that this life brings, A wey ya wey ya ho We are Healing We are healing with the Earth

Here is the link to listen to it, and here is the link to watch the official video.

What in the lyrics resonated with me? How do I sense my connection with Nature? Have I ever learned something from observing Nature's cycles? Do I open myself and my senses to Nature's beauty and wisdom? How does Nature nourish me?